Tough Love

Fuck the Wii. That shit is so wack. Somewhere far along this road Wii lost our soul... to a motion control. What the fuck happened to making hardcore games Nintendo? I won't buy a game just because it has a lot of blood and swears in it. If I wanted that I'd go see a Rated R movie. It's a lot cheaper these days...

Fuck the Xbox 360. That shit is so wack. Microsoft's Red Ring of Death is inFamous. Who releases a product knowing most of the units are defective? I'm guessing they're trying to go green. This billion dollar fuck up feels like Microsoft's version of recycling...


Fuck the PS3. That shit is so wack. Where the fuck is the price cut Sony? Your piece of shit has been overpriced ever since it hit the market. Stop being a bitch and lower the price. If it wasn't a birthday present, I wouldn't break my wallet just to use the Dualshock 3. It's not that serious.

I Run Liberty City

Running is not the way to go in Liberty City. Tapping A (or X) every 2 seconds gets annoying, and crossing streets can be a pain. Imagine the amount of time you would waste walking from North Holland to the Gun Store in Chinatown. Use your time to enjoy the luxuries of Liberty City. If your well connected, a trip to the gun store is pointless. Just call Little Jacob and he'll probably meet you in Middle Park West with discounted prices.

Now's about a good time to take a car. I'd go with a Turismo at Grotti in Middle Park East. Don't feel like driving? No problem. Just give Roman a call and Mohammed will be on his way. It's the only taxi ride worth taking in Liberty City. Mohammed is hilarious, and the ride is free.

Now that your in Middle Park East, stop by Perseus for a new outfit. Across the street from Perseus is Grotti the car dealership. I recommend shooting the window of the Turismo you want from Perseus. The car alarm will stop by the time you get inside the car. Now that you have a warnted star, get your ass to Purgatory to the Auto Limbo to change the color of your car. I would go with a bright color, but to each his own. Now that your car is a new color, might as well wash it. The High Speed Highway Car Wash is down the street. Shine Bright.

Now that your car is fresh, your having a good day according to Busta Rhymes. Might as well cruise somewhere. How about Star Junction? You could visit Split Sides and see a stand up performance from Katt Williams. A friend could join you. Maybe you should invite Jacob for hooking you up with weapons. If you see the show by yourself, you might get a phone call from Brucie as you leave. He might want to go on a helicopter ride. If you choose to go, you'll get my favorite view of the city. Brucie will want you to take him to a landmark in Liberty City. It could be the Statue of Happiness or the Dragon Heart tower to name a few places. Anything is possible in Liberty City...

Graphics Matter

Outdated Graphics are hideous. Wait let me rephrase that. Outdated 3D Graphics are hideous. I try to tolerate a game like Metal Gear Solid on the PSOne. I end up turning it off before the long ass opening credits are done. Looking at PSOne graphics today make me wonder how I ever thought they looked good. I must have been drunk. I do realize that there are a ton of classic games on both the PSOne and the Nintendo 64. I don't think that feeling I had when I was drunk would be there today if I played any of the classics. You can definitely see the growing pains that today's 3D graphics had to go through.

2D graphics from 20 years ago are fine in my book. I could still play classics like Contra and Punch Out!!! today without thinking twice about the graphics. Sure the graphics don't compare to today's, but they dont feel like they were trying too hard to be impressive in. I dont think people bought games back then because of the top notch production value in the graphics... or maybe they did.

When it comes to portable graphics, there's no way I could play a Gameboy today. 20 years is a long time for something to evolve. Especially when that something has dominated the market the whole time. Think about what the iPod's going to be like in 11 years? It's already converted itself into a phone... Nintendo better watch out.

Am I the only person who thinks backward compatibility is overrated? I'm always looking for the next best thing, and having to go back to outdated graphics and clunkier physics has never appealed to me. I have to downgrade enough when I play the Wii. If old games could be upscaled like DVD's then maybe we'd be talking.

The beginning of the end...

Resident Evil is too big for it's shadow. Success is a motherfucker. It can take a series that had better gameplay than plot and turn it into a 3D Hollywood snorefest. In the movies defense, I've only seen the first 10 minutes of the first Resident Evil movie so there's a possibility they could be good. I doubt it though.

The game has some kinks that need to be worked out. Resident Evil 5 is successful, but that could easily change for the sequel. If Resident Evil 6 is another action adventure game with a weak plot then I think it won't do as well. Wesker feels more like an annoying little brother than a villan, and Chris is so clueless it's sad. I saw the climax coming from a mile away. Before it was easier to forgive the plot because the gameplay was the shit, but now it feels uninspired. I'm not a fan of more of the same. I need some more flavor in my coffee if I'm going to drink it.

Happy Halloween

Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony

October 29, 2009

Food for Thought

Why does it take some huge convention for release dates to be announced for new games? If you didn't know Comic-Con begins today in San Diego which showcases gaming among a bunch of other things. Expect to hear release dates for the rest of the week. Here's one:

Uncharted 2

October 13, 2009.

This could only mean that September is almost here. September has always been a bittersweet month for me. On one hand the drought in my lab pretty much ends in late August/early September. On the other hand, I'm more busy because I go back to school along with working. Good thing I'm good at hiding...

This drought sucks by the way. I'm starting to think every gamer is expected to play the same game for months at a time which is something I don't do. If the game is good, I'll finish it and write about it here. This can take anywhere from 3 days to 3 weeks depending on my level of focus with the game. I spent 2 weeks with Fallout 3 spending at least 5 hours each day playing it. I finished the story in 13 hours, but realized the story is only the beginning. I can't wait for New Vegas... Grand Theft Auto IV is the only game I still occasionally play. I'm still on my quest for 100%, but it scares me that I know my way around Liberty City. I really hope this new Batman game is going to be as good as the buzz surrounding it.

The drought will be over soon...

Family 1st

Can gaming bring a family together? I believe so. Back in 1993 my mother and I would spend hours playing Streets of Rage 2. Her favorite character was Axel, and mine was Skate. I'm not sure how many times we beat that game, but I could say we both finished it with every playable character. Those were the days... Streets of Rage 2 was the only game my mother enjoyed.

That was until the Nintendo Wii showed up. She knew about Wii Fit and asked me what I thought about it. I took a while to answer because I had to hold back my bias against casual games. When I put the bias aside I realized that she should give it a try. I told her everything I knew about it, and she planned on buying it. She came home with a copy of My Fitness Coach from BJ's and asked me what I thought about it. I told her I never heard of it. She returned it the next day.

Wii Fit showed up a few days later. After some time with it, I asked my mother what she thought about it. She loves it. I played it with her a couple times, and I see where my competitive nature comes from. Wii Fit changed my perception about the casual games released on the Wii. I give Nintendo credit. My mother understands my passion for videogames a little more thanks to Wii Fit. Ego aside Wii Fit is a fun game that helps bring people together.

I couldn't say that about most of the games out there these days...

* My mother read this post and she approves of it. She even added it to her favorites. I love you Ma...